She wondered if things would have been different. Yes? No? Maybe. Possibly.
If she wondered? Or if things were different?
Both.
She liked to think of the possibility that one decision could turn the future around a 1000 times. Maybe more. Maybe less. She wondered if she would miss out if she said no. And maybe miss out on something else if she said yes. She didn’t like making decisions. But she didn’t like anyone making them for her either. Decisions. Oh she could make those alright. Being responsible for them though was a whole different story. She wondered if the choices she made changed other people’s lives more than she realized. And if they were all changing each other’s lives, with every passing second, how was she supposed to believe that voice that said, “Life is what you make it.”? Six degrees of Separation. She was amused by how her friends seemed to find it an exciting prospect. It scared her. Did she really want to be that connected? Here. There. (Hello. I believe we’ve met before. Yes. No.) Everywhere.
We plan. We strategize. We choose. We sacrifice. We manipulate. We get manipulated. We hope. We scheme. We stall. We wish. We scream. We rant. We win. We lose. We cheat. We score.
Black and White. Black and White. Black and White. Black and White. RAINBOW.
Sometimes I think life is like a game of wizards’ chess. Not regular chess. No. Life hasn’t gotten that boring yet.* I just wish I knew who was making the moves.
